Project Runway Season 8 – Episode 8 – A Rough Day On The Runway
That’s how I felt about this week’s episode of Project Runway.
The designers are asked to create an outfit for a modern-day version of Jackie Kennedy with a $150 budget and a day to pull it off.
Is it just me or are fashion icons like Jackie Kennedy and Audrey Hepburn who they are because you could put a potato sack over them and they’d still come across as classy, sophisticated, and elegant?
It’s not so much in what they wear — because, if you really think about it, the whole “classic” look isn’t really particularly fashion forward and doesn’t say anything new or particularly interesting.
The classic look stands the test of time because the women who rock that look are the sort of women most women want to be — refined, respectable, classy dames.
That aside, the other reason this was a yawn-fest of an episode is because the Coven are still flogging the same dead horse.
Michael C. shows some spirit by telling the camera, “If you’re gonna hate on me for that, step up your game and win a fucking challenge.”
I wish he’d had the balls to say it to their bitchy faces — but I know what it’s like wanting to stand up to a coven. I work with one — the Hell Hags of Wisteria Lane.
As a total side note, I’m seriously developing a hate-on for female managers — especially when you’ve got a whole bunch of them working together and acting like they’re the fucking Ya-Ya Sisterhood, when in reality, they’re nothing more than a bunch of corporate psychopaths who feed off of each other and their weird bitch energy.
Back to the episode.
Michael D. is the only one who sort of comes to Michael C.’s defense, doing a complete flip flop from his trash talking a few weeks earlier.
He reasons, “He may not be as seasoned, but it doesn’t mean he’s not talented.”
Hells, yeah. I mean, dude’s won two challenges. How many challenges has Ivy won? Or Valerie for that matter?
Those two hell hags are just jealous bitches, whining from the bottom, too deluded to realize that they’re both one-trick ponies.
Like, take Valerie for example.
Really? Zippers and pleating? Again?
I’m glad Nina actually called her out on that this time around.
(Though, to be perfectly honest, I didn’t totally hate Valerie’s outfit.)
I just thought it was sort of a bum deal when Tim announced the twist — an additional $150 to create a piece of accompanying outerwear — and it turned out Valerie had already created outerwear…so, what to do except overdesign the beast she’s already got?
What was trotted out on the runway this week was just bad.
There was a clear winner — a no-brainer that even the Judges With No Taste had to agree on: Mondo.
When he got to Mood with no plan, but waited for a piece of fabric to “speak to him” and settled on a purple, black and ivory houndstooth tweed, you knew he could only go somewhere good with this.
It was funny when Michael D. told Mondo that he looked like Jackie Kennedy and Christopher added, “If Jackie came back as a tranny.”
Who knew the Handsome One could also make a funny?
(I posted this picture because it was all sorts of cuteness.)
April, of course, had immunity from the previous week, but if she hadn’t, I think she should have been in the bottom for this monstrosity:
Her model looked like an anorexic tranny whore with fins sprouting out of her twig-like arms.
I didn’t get where she was going with this and it’s certainly not something I could ever see on a modern-day Jackie Kennedy. (Or Michelle Obama, if you really wnat to think of a modern-day Jackie.)
Andy’s, of course, was also several shades of fugly.
You know it’s just a hop, skip, jump to Loserville when Tim swings by your work station and looks horribly concerned as he tries to find some polite way to tell you that you’ve got a disaster of nuclear proportions on your hands.
“Jackie O would not have cameltoe,” he tells Andy.
Project Runway alumn, Laura Bennett, in her blog, begs to differ on the cameltoe assessment and says it’s “actually camel-butt, if we want to be accurate here.”
She goes on to write, “I love me some M.C. Hammer, but I’ve never seen antyhing in his videos, legit or otherwise, that remotely reminds me of any first lady. Or second, or third for that matter.”
When Andy finally attempts to defend himself by saying that he’s not an American sportswear designer, Michael Kors shoots back, “So what? Are you a grand couturier? Did I miss something? I mean, come on.”
I love it when the judges are mean to the people who deserve it — I think everybody benefits from being knocked down a peg or two.
It was hilarious when Michael Kors and January Jones sort of ganged up on Andy’s styling.
“Why is she wearing Nicole Kidman’s boots from Cold Mountain?” he asks.
“And her hair from Far and Away?” January Jones adds.
I don’t know why. This struck me as incredibly funny and I couldn’t stop laughing. (Yes, people. I’d be the person in a movie theatre who’d continue laughing way past the point of something being funny.)
Ultimately, it was Michael D. who was sent home because his outfit was dubbed “mall wear.”
I really have to wind this entry down with this gem from Laura Bennett’s blog:
“Michael Drummond has to go because his outfit looks like mall-wear, and Jackie O might have been a bullimic chain-smoker with a cheating husband who married a shipping tycoon for money and then lived with another married man until the end of her life, but she would never be caught dead in a mall.”
Hilarious — but I don’t think she would have been caught dead in M.C. Hammer pants or fins or that awful weirdness that Gretchen sent out.
Like, seriously: ew.